Updating myself?

Just a few weeks ago, I went to Ranau to attend the Karnival Nunuk Ragang held in the heart of Ranau Town. Nothing is special about the carnival. actually. Just a crowd of people. spending some precious time with their family, or friends, or their loved one. laughing. you know. But what caught my attention at that time was, this...

This is a picture of two siblings selling balloons during the carnival. I looked around them trying to find out if their parents are around. But, no. their are all by themselves. and that time was 10pm. so, along my way back to KK that night, I kept on thinking about how strong these two kids are. they got my respect. God bless them.

Enough with that. back to the present, we are almost to the end of 2012. I guess, most of us already have some kind of list, you know.. " what I want for 2013". or maybe, "my target for 2013". isn't it? no?? I think you should work on it before new year!


I've been spending a few days, maybe weeks, listing all I want for 2013. this.. and that. and after a long and tiring (tiring lah sangat) process. I finally come out with a list. a secret one. hohoho... So, along the process, I did some or more reflection about, what I have been doing in 2012? what did I get? did I managed to fulfill my 2012 wish? It's been a year, did I really grow up? (physically, I didn't get taller, but wider. haha). These are some of the question that I used in order to make my 2013 wish list a good one, achievable and yes, realistic!

Last year (2011) was a nightmare to me. I go through some critical and serious depression about my life. specifically, my studies. I stopped my studies in matriculation and I was like, what is happening in my life? I almost lost myself.  And it goes on to early this year. I went through some medical procedure to find out what is really happened to my hand. It takes me months and cost. after going through medical procedures,  the neurologist told me that I might have Dystonia. I was like, knocked down real hard. I almost gave up as I can't accept it. why?? hahaha...

Just a week ago, my first semester result came out. And for the very first time since back then, I feels like I'm alive! I almost can't believe it, I get a distinction! There is no words can tell how happy and grateful  I am. I thank God so much for He showed me that I should, and I must believe in Him. No matter how hard, how much it hurts, keep believing that He will always be there for me!

Hoho... so, that is how my life have been in 2012. I have learned a lot in 2012. I met new friends. I have a life!  Thanks God.  Yet, I believe that there are so much more to learn. I will keep reminding myself to stay humble and cheerful. And to keep believing in Him.  I'm turning 20 by 2013. I don't know what is waiting ahead, but I'm ready. how about you?